'CANDLES' May & June 2007 Issue

Memo from God

Dr. Smruti Ranjan Panda

To: You
Date: Today
From: The Boss
Subject: Yourself

Dear Son / Daughter,

I am God. Today I will be handling all your problems. Please remember that I do not need your help.

If life happens to deliver a situation that you cannot handles, do not attempt to resolve it, put in the SFGTD (Something For God To Do) box. All situations will be resolved, but in My time, not yours.

Once the matter is placed in the box, do not hold on to it by worrying about it. Instead focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now.

If you find yourself stuck in traffic, do not despair. There are people in this world for whom driving is an unheard of privilege.

Should you have a bad day at work, think of the man who has been out of work for years.

Should you despair over relationship gone bad, think of the person who has never known, what it’s like to love and be loved in return.

Should your car break down leaving you miles away from assistance, think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.

Should you notice a new grey hair in the mirror, think of the cancer patient on chemotherapy who wishes she had hair to examine.

Should you find yourself at loss and pondering what life is all about, asking what is my purpose? Be thankful there are those who didn’t live long enough to get the opportunity to ask theses questions.

Should you find yourself the victim of other people’s bitterness and ignorance, remember things could be worse. You could be one of them.

With regards

God.


“God may not be in the genesis of an event, but He can be in the exodus of any event. Your problems may have begun with the devil, but by the time they get to you and through you, they have a divine purpose running in them.”

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Sex – A Deadly Weapon of Devil

By Chiradeep Patra

The children and the youth are the most vulnerable to the attacks of the devil. Devil has many ways and weapons to attack them. Among all the weapons the greatest is ‘Sex’. Sex has captured the young minds terribly. Satan makes it so attractive and beautiful that it is really very difficult for them to get out of the allurement of sex.

After a detailed study I could find out the sources of the materials or contents concerning sex that attracts the young minds are as follows:

Magazines & Newspaper: Now a days if you see magazines and newspapers you will find filmy gossips, pictures of skimpily clad models and actresses and their erotic life styles are projected in such a lively way, the children and youth find it interesting and attractive to see and read. They keep it under the mattresses and pillows and gaze at all most every time they get a chance to peep at.

Books & Novels: They like reading and seeing books having pornographic pictures and readings. Sidney Sheldon, Mills and Boons, Nancy Friday etc. are the bestseller authors and publishers, which have romantic stories where sexual encounters are being described in details.

Internet & Chatting: This is a new addition to the list of sex addictions. The Students sit long hours before a lifeless computer and go on sex chatting with their online chat pals. They chat sex through web cam also. Even I have read in the newspaper that there are husbands who chat online with their female friends when their wives go to sleep. They surf through Internet for pornographic sites. Previously the youth had to go out for dating and there was a problem at home when they return late in the evening or night. But now a days going out is not necessary, because just sitting at home before a computer and dating a online partner is far more easier and innovative.

T.V. & Movies: The most available device at home is T.V. it is another easy source of sex and sensuality. Children and youth they secretly watch late night movies. Even there are pornographic movies in VCDs and DVDs are available in the CD Parlors. When there is nobody at home the children bring CDs and watch with their VCD players.

Cell Phones & Camera Phones: We are aware of the sex scandal of the students with the use of a camera phone. They can receive and send erotic and pornographic SMS from cell phone to cell phone.

The adverse & after effects of sexual contents

a. Sexual contents mesmerize their minds, make them addicted to it, capture their attention and they start fantasizing day and night. As a result of which they forget their responsibilities and studies.

b. Sexual contents motivate and forces for immediate gratification, which is impossible for the children and youth in reality. This frustrates them and makes them depressed.

c. Sexual contents arouse their libido and they involve in masturbation for temporary pleasure. Later they feel unsatisfied as well as guilty of what they‘re doing.

d. Sexual contents sometimes affect the teens to such an extent that they get involved in sexual ventures with opposite sex in reality and end up in premarital sex. That brings shame on themselves as well as on their families.

e. ‘Rape’ is the highest extent of the effect of sexual contents on the minds of these young ones. Later they might have to end up their lives in jail or hide themselves from the whole world rest of their lives.

Few Simple Solutions:

· REPLACE YOUR ADDICTION WITH A BETTER INTEREST (COL.3: 2).
· DON’T BE SELFISH, BUT HELP OTHERS (PHIL. 2:3-4).
· SUBMIT YOURSELF TO A GREATER POWER (JAMES 4: 7-10).
· TRUST IN THE LORD (PROVERBS 3: 5 – 6)
· REFUSE TO SIN (GENESIS 39: 9 –10)
· RESIST THE DEVIL (JAMES 4: 7)
· WATCH & PRAY (MATTHEW 26: 41)
· PUT ON THE ARMOUR OF GOD (EPHESIANS 6: 10 – 18)
· GUARD YOUR HEART (PROVERBS 4:23)
· FLEE FROM THE EVIL DESIRES (2 TIMOTHY 2:22)
· LISTEN TO YOUR PARENTS (PROVERBS 1: 8 –9)
· DON’T IGNORE DISCIPLINE (PROVERBS 15:32)
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Easter Story**********

By Mrs. Helen Swarna

If Jesus Chose to stay in heaven

And If he would have refused to take our burden

The earth and our life would be so dark, no light

Without the Morning Star So Bright

Each day would start with fear

Without the Father to start it dear

Each and everything would scare

Without the Mighty Protector so near

People drowning in the world of sin

Searching for something that they cannot find

The world would be full of chaos, full of misery

If there is no Easter Story.
But Our Jesus is Full of Love

When He saw the mankind from the world above

His heart ached for us

To Love and to Deliver Us

So He came down to earth

On the christmas day, in a very humble birth

He never lived for himself, the Prince of Peace

Coz His only aim was to offer us Peace

He came to deliver from the bondage of sin, to set us free

But His own people never understood Him and slained Him on the tree

He shed every drop of His blood for us

Even then He was filled with love for usHe died, But victoriously ROSE UP TODAY

Just to forever with us , closer to stay

Because of this day, We have nothing to fear

Coz Our Living God is always near

So Rejoice in the Lord and Sing aloud today

Coz in history…this is the most happiest Day!

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Quotations

“An aim in life is the only fortune worth finding; and it is not to be found in foreign lands, but in the heart itself.”
Robert Louis Stevenson

“I dream my paintings and then I paint my dreams.”
Vincent Van Gogh

“To say 'I love you' one must know first how to say the 'I'.”
Ayn Rand

“Forgiveness is unlocking the door to set someone free and realizing you were the prisoner.”
Max Lucado
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Longest Name

Anna Pepper was born in Derby, England, on 19 December 1882. She was given 26 first names one for each letter of the alphabet, in alphabetical order:

“Anna Bertha Cecilia Diana Emily Fanny Gertrude Hypatia Inez Jane Kate Louisa Maud Nora Ophelia Prudence Quince Rebecca Starkey Teresa Ulysis Venus Winifred Xenophon Yetty Zeus Pepper.”
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Keys To Communication

Take turns while talking, don't interrupt

Learn to Listen

Concentrate

Be Understanding

Respect Different Opinions

Keep the focus on the problem

Accept the differences

Avoid unnecessary expectations

Take a time-out

Always Do A Healthy Evaluation

'CANDLES' March & April 2007 Issue

Editorial

Be A Team Member
Mr. Chiradeep Patra

Man is a social animal. This is the first and foremost statement we find in the civics book that we used to study in our school days. Even in the Bible we find God created man and woman both, thinking that they will live together complementing each other in everything within their life spans. Our creation is such that we cannot survive all alone in this world. Our survival strategy is to live with each other. There are advantages in staying and cooperating with each other. Life is designed for companionship, not isolation, for friendship, not loneliness. Some prefer isolation, thinking they can do everything on their own, which is just impossible. The great king Solomon also supports the fact that it is very important for us to live with one another to survive. He expresses his viewpoints as under:

“I observed yet another example of meaninglessness in our world. This is the case of a man who is all alone, without a child or a brother, yet who works hard to gain as much wealth as he can. But then he asks himself, “Who am I working for? Why am I giving up so much pleasure now?” It is all so meaningless and depressing. Two people can accomplish more than twice as much as one; they get a better return for their labor. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But people who are alone when they fall are in real trouble. And on a cold night, two under the same blanket can gain warmth from each other. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.”
(Eccl. 4: 7-12)
Wow! What a study! So, friends, don't isolate yourself and try to do it alone. Seek companions; be a team member.

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The Family that stays together
Mr. Binoy Kumar Muduli

Family is God's wonderful creation of a closely knitted community. The members of the family share moments of happiness and sorrow. There are also painful moments of strife and quarrel. But God's intention of family is not to create strife or division and falling apart. A healthy nation is built upon healthy families. Let's take a moment to check the health of our families.

Do we appreciate one another?
In a healthy family, the members express a high degree of appreciation for each other. Several families even created projects around the house to stimulate praise. For example, one household of five could have creative events with funny, attractive title. Every few months, the family members could meet and each could spend one minute praising every other member of the family. There could even be a family post box placed in a central place. Each member, at their convenient time, could drop small chits of appreciation or positive quality of other members. Such creative fun events are certainly stimulating and inspirational.

Do we have quality time together?
The healthy and happy families spend a great deal of quality time together. They genuinely enjoy being together. They worked at doing things that involved every member of the family. It is a wonderful team where all members are self-motivated directed. They share responsibilities and create synergy.

Do we effectively communicate?
The successful families have good communication patterns. They spend time talking to each other. The key to effective communication in a family is that members listen and work at understanding each other.

Are we committed to one another?
The healthy families have a strong sense of commitment. They actively promote one another's happiness and welfare. An example of this commitment is in how these families handle themselves when things become too hectic, causing them to spend less time together. In your home, each family member could make a list of his or her individual activities. The things he or she really doesn't want to do or that isn't very important are scratched to provide more time for family involvement.

How strong is our religious orientation?
The next common ingredient is a high degree of religious orientation. These families participate in religious activities together. They are committed to a spiritual lifestyle.

How do we handle crisis situations?
The happy family has the ability to deal with crises in a positive manner. This isn't to say that they enjoy crises, but even in the worst situation they are able to find some positive elements, no matter how tiny, and focus on that.

So make all efforts to have a healthy and happy family. Enjoy life and help built a happy nation.

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Basics of Nutrition: A report from the USA
Mrs. Allison Willis

Greetings from the USA! My name is Allison Willis and I am a registered and licensed dietitian in the great state of Oklahoma. I have my bachelor's and master's degrees in nutrition from the University of Central Oklahoma. I currently work at a local hospital and also teach a nutrition class at a nearby university.

I had the privilege of meeting Mr. Chiradeep Patra and his lovely wife during a recent tourist trip to Calcutta. Mr. Patra told me about his newsletter and welcomed my input. I am honored to be included in this newsletter and hope to contribute further in the future. I am very concerned for community health and feel that nutrition is a big contributor. Unfortunately, in the United States at least, anyone can call themselves a nutritionist. You do not have to have a degree or any credentials whatsoever to give nutrition advice to the public. This is a tragedy to public health and has led to the dissemination of a large amount of misinformation regarding the science of nutrition.

My advice to you is to seek nutrition advice from a professional. Evaluate and research your sources for nutrition information. Many of the popular diets in the United States have no scientific support and can actually do more harm than good. Yes, you may lose weight, but you may be losing muscle weight rather than fat. Or you may be simply dehydrating yourself. Our society in America has accepted many lies, and I hope that this is not the case in India. But rather than focusing on the lies, I would like to give a very brief introduction to the truths of good nutrition, in hopes that they would give you a place to start in evaluating your own nutritional well-being.

Foods are not good or bad. There is nothing that you can NEVER eat. A good diet and I do not mean diet in the popular sense of the word, but rather mean your lifestyle of eating consists of balance and moderation. The things your mother told you were right: Eat all different kinds of foods and eat them in moderation. Three meals a day, or even 5 smaller meals a day, are important because they keep your metabolism going throughout the day. Many people make the mistake of eating just one or two meals a day, and end up stuffing themselves because their bodies are “starving” for nutrients and aren't sure when they may get more again.

Fruits, vegetables, whole grains, low fat dairy products, lean meats including fish, poultry, and loin cuts of beef, and even healthy oils can all be part of a well-balance diet. It is not necessary to eliminate snacks, but rather to choose healthier snacks in appropriate portions.

To cut portion sizes, try eating only 75% of what's on your plate. Feel your fullness take your time eating and spend at least 20 minutes per meal. It takes your body this long to begin to feel whether you are full or not. Use smaller serving dishes and utensils studies show that this decreases how much you will eat. Drink water or calorie-free drinks with your meals, or try to drink a glass before your meal. This will help you feel more full.

Along with eating healthy, it is important to exercise. If you are trying to lose weight and only trying to do so with your diet, you are only fighting half the fight. Any form of movement could be considered exercise, so even if you'll never run a marathon you can certainly walk more or increase your movement in some form.

Be wary of drinking calories alcohol, sodas (except for diet sodas), and coffee (except for black coffee) can be concentrated sources of calories and should be used in great moderation. Aim to increase your water intake for the best effect. If you are not eating a well-balanced diet, consider taking a simple mulit-vitamin. You do not need the expensive kinds touting extreme percentages of vitamins and minerals. The truth is, you can only absorb so much and the rest will be excreted anyway. Save your money. Besides, some vitamins can be harmful to you if consumed in excess.

And finally, although I could of course go on, don't expect to lose weight rapidly. It is a slow process. You should aim to lose no more than 1-2 pounds a week. Losing weight quicker than this is harmful to your body because it throws off your internal equilibrium. And if you make a mistake and indulge once or twice, don't fret. Just go back to your healthy eating plan and forgive yourself. If you never indulge, you may someday give up your intense striving. It's OK every now and then. Just don't skip your next meal to make up for it. That will become a vicious cycle.

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My Heavenly Home
Mrs. Helen Swarna

It is one Golden Morning,
for which the saints wait with longing;
That glorious day is drawing near,
When the sound of trumpets, we shall hear.

The clouds will scroll up like a sheet,
When our Loving Father, we shall finally meet;
That day we can really kiss His feet,
our hearts filled with Joy, when the Holy Angel's greet;

We will hold our Mighty Father's Hand,
When Joyous music it plays, the heavenly Band;
This day of promise we shall soon see,
And Forever in His presence we shall be;

He's Going to say, “Well done, my servant,
You have been so Faithful and Patient;”
As a Glorious Bride, we shall shine,
When At last in our heavenly home,
With our father, we shall dine;

There will be a royal banquet, beyond the sky,
In the Land where Joy and Music never die,
At Last, we shall lay our burden down,
And wear a beautiful Golden Crown;

Oh! Lord my God! How long should I wait…
To enter the glorious Pearly Gate
Lord, Faster let that golden day come,
And take me to my Heavenly Home.

'CANDLES' Dec. 06, Jan. & Feb. 2007 Issue

Guest Editorial

Christmas
Kalpana Saxena

Christmas! Christmas brings colourful light bulbs and ornaments on the Christmas tree along with the new and the traditional Carols in the air. It brings the replica of the original Manger added with a paper star in the background to make relevant the Nativity story to our times. Then of course cakes and bakes, not leaving sweets in the Mega Malls. Oh! Buying of trendy clothes in vogue! Forgetting Bata in the Shoe Bazar and shoe sale in China Town, run a marathon to a Woodland or Nike or Reebok. Not realizing the amount it would swipe out of my budget through that plastic card which is not felt in hand or seen with eyes nor the currency calculated unlike the 52 Sunday Offerings given in the Church which is meticulously felt with hand, is seen with eyes and of course counted before my right hand offers it to Whom it belongs ~ God. It means meeting relatives and friends, hosting a dinner party. Plans to watch the latest movie release?

Christmas! Almost forgotten every year by mid January, drawing life back to the valley after the mountain top thrilling Christmas experience. It ends faster than it all began.

Christmas! Christmas is celebrating “giving”, not the ordinary, but, the extra ordinary, incomparable Divine kind of giving. God gave. All that exists belongs to God, of which He could have given anything, everything but He gave that which was precious to Him ~ His only begotten Son Jesus. God gave because He loved the world ~ every tribe, culture, nation, religion, creed, colour, peoples with Agape love. God made no distinction, no difference between them all, though each and every one a sinner The Holy, Perfect, Righteous God, loved the sinful world.

Christmas! For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life. (John 3: 16)

Believe in Jesus. Live for Jesus. Live forever.

Have a meaningful, joyful, peaceful and a blessed Christmas.

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A Year with CANDLES

I am really grateful to God for being so kind to the ‘CANDLES family’ throughout this year 2006. His blessings for ‘Candles’ was abundant. There were ups and downs but God was with us and He carried us safely throughout the year. I also thank our well wishers, supporters, and friends who have encouraged us, gave their critical appraisal, and appreciated our work for His glory. Some of them also didn't forget to pray for CANDLES and for us. Though i didn't get regular feedbacks from our readers but today I want to recapitulate whatever comments they gave during this year of blessings.

One of my aunts wrote, “I really like CANDLES so much...” Before this she said “I distributed CANDLES in my fellowship and then gave a small testimony of yours...” Wow that really encouraged me very much. Another aunty called me once, and asked “what happened to CANDLES this time...Did you send it to us? Because people are asking about it now...” That was such a morale booster, I really cant explain. One pastor wrote to me, saying “Brother! What you and your wife are doing is really commendable. May God bless you...” Another AG Pastor sent me an email saying, “Brother! I saw your publication CANDLES and really liked it. Can I have few of those regularly...” One HI faculty wrote a mail saying, “Well done Chiradeep, The Candles ~ Most of the write-ups are not only very good but also informative. The articles are important since they deal with current issues. Keep it up!” She also wrote “Persevere, never give up for He has found you faithful and has trusted this online ministry to you to serve Him”. One of my friends wrote, “Dear Chiradeep! Hope the work both of you are carrying out is in full swing. May God bless the work and enrich it.” Another brother in Christ wrote, “Greetings! I am at Hyderabad now and just opened your web site. It is fantastic! Candle is growing brighter day by day. God bless you both.”

Apart from all the praises there were few critical appraisals also. Which I have taken it very positively for the betterment of CANDLES. One most respectable uncle who previously was a teacher and principal corrected one of the copies of CANDLES and sent it back to me with a note highlighting the mistakes in the English language & grammar. I am grateful to him and the readers of these kind who read CANDLES that intently and seriously. Again another reader wrote “request someone with an excellent command over the English language to proof read”.

I thank God for everything as we had to face time and financial constraints but still He was faithful to keep His promises by providing everything we needed for publishing of CANDLES in the year 2006. I thank those who supported CANDLES financially and in diligent prayers. Candles has completed one year and has already started another new year. May God’s blessings be on CANDLES throughout the year 2007.

Chiradeep Patra, Editor

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Food For Mind: Meditation (2)
Dr. K.N.Sukumar

TECHNIQUES OF RELAXATION
Here are a few simple techniques explained which one can practice regularly at least 7-10 days for definite results.

A) DEEP BREATHING
This is the most convenient & simple mode of relaxation. To use this technique you may lie down, or even do it in sitting position. Ensure your back is supported and your body is at comfort. Now breath deeply through the nose, letting your stomach expands as much as possible. Hold your breath for few seconds then exhale slowly through nose & observe inward movements of abdomen.The breathing should be slow, rapid & deep. Continue breathing & start counting your breath. Your mind moves away from anxiety.

B) AUTOGENIC RELAXATION TECHNIQUE
This is essentially an exercise involving self-directed talk. Their benefit is to normalize the process of bodily functioning. This process is one of the passive concentrations, lie prone on floor on a firm mattress or couch, place your feet apart, hands 8-10 inches apart from the body palms facing upwards. Instruct yourself to spend 20 minutes in a state of continued relaxation. With your eyes closed mentally bring your attention toe the toes of your feet Instruct your toes to relax, than let your attention move to the toes of other foot. Say yourself sub vocally “TOES RELAX” .Do the same to whole body. This aids in sleep and relaxation.

C) PROGRESSIVE MUSCULAR RELAXATION
Through the experiments and experience it is learnt that, if people would learn to relax their muscles through precise method mental relaxation would follow. This technique involves tensing muscles & relaxing various muscle groups throughout body in orderly sequence. You may be seated or laying down Take few deep breaths, relax. Tense all toes both right and left leg for 10 seconds, relax and visualize the changes at particular part & relax it for 20 seconds. Likewise all muscles should be tensed & relaxed from toes towards head.

At the end tense all muscles of body including head muscles & relax completely. Various psychological disorders are treated with this method.

"Your Praying Friends"

Your Praying Friends

Are you depressed, sad, stressed out, feeling lonely, discouraged?
Do you have family problems?
Don't worry!
‘The Candles’ has taken a new step for you.
Just take time to write to us at ‘share_your_problems@hotmail.com’.
We are ready to LISTEN, to ENCOURAGE you and PRAY for you.
We have ‘Praying Friends’ who have eagerly waiting
for your requests to pray for you continuously.
You can also contact us through our postal address.
May God Bless you!

(Mrs. Asmita Patra, Manager for “Your Praying Friends”)

'CANDLES' October & November 2006 Issue

Editorial

Working Women

A woman has an important role to play today in her family and society. Nobody can deny today that the women have gone farther as the men do in every aspect of life. But we should remember that God has given her a greater responsibility and that is building a home, which a man cannot do. The Bible describes the responsibilities of a woman briefly and those are as follows:

A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls. She considers a field and buys it out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Mothers! Wives! Sisters! God wants you to be great. He expects you to build new homes and rebuild the broken ones. He trusts that only you can fulfill that purpose of His as He has given that strength in you to build and build and only to build.

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Drugs and the Youth

Khristian Patra

I have a friend who fell in love when he was in College, but the girl he was in love with, rejected his proposal. He was so heart broken and dejected that … he went into drugs! He tried everything until he realized what he was doing was so unlike what he should have done. He went into rehabilitation and now is a God fearing and good man.

'Drugs' is something that was just known to me in theory until I joined St. Xavier's college in Kolkata for my graduation. It was for the first time that I realized that drugs was not just a theory but it was actually happening among the youth of my city, not necessarily among the lower class youth but also youth from the affluent society. I was studying Mass Communication. My classmates at college called themselves “creative”, and they had a very funny idea that if one has to be creative, one has to be in a parallel world. And to reach the parallel world, you need a medium. That medium was usually cocaine, grass (weed), marijuana, pot or LSD. Suddenly, all these things that were known to me in theory stared at my face like a bad dream.

There were many a-times that I was offered drugs, and if not drugs, I was offered a cigarette “just for a first-timers”. There were many times where I thought, what should I do to prove to these guys that what they are doing is not right. “Should I take a puff?” I asked myself, just to prove to them that they are wrong? See, temptations don't come in large doses. They come in tiny little packets where no one would ever think twice about how they are being sucked into an invisible black hole.

When we were brought up in good families, where we learnt moral values, then everyone expects that we will be good kids, then good teenagers, then good youth and then finally good adults. But just our relationship with God and the background of our “good families” does not mean that we are exempted from temptations. In fact, usually, we are the ones most tempted because we are to follow a godly example.

Another thing is, are we thinking for the betterment of those who are under the bondage of drugs? Are we helping our friends or brothers or sisters who are on the verge of destruction? Or we are just resisting the evil and playing safe for ourselves? There is an estimated 7.5 crore Indians are drug addicts. As a youth of good moral background are we active for the eradication of drug addiction? Are we meeting the drug addicts and creating awareness among them about their families, which go through severe guilt, shame, anger, grief & humiliation?

I would encourage everybody today! Friends! Let’s gather ourselves to stretch out our helping hands to our fellow young friends and pull them out of the pit of death.

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Contract Vs. Covenant

Mrs. Sapna Nanda

Marriage is a wonderful relationship, which according to general opinion is made in heaven. It is partially true because marriage is a union instituted by God (Gen. 2:18-25), but also the partners have to play vital role to keep the fire of love burning on earth. It involves the active participation of both the partners in working out a good, healthy and everlasting marriage.

In the present generation with modern ideas about freedom and self- centeredness creeping in, marriage is viewed as a Contract between two persons. Two people make a deal to experience “live in” relationship as long as it suits them. With the appearance of suffocation and boredom, the partners split with mutual understanding. These relationships are not based on love but selfishness and ambitions, which can be easily broken. Sometimes marriage is treated like a business deal. Faithfulness until the work is done.

The correct perspective of marriage is that it is a Covenant between two people along with the presence and witness of a third party (actually the first) i.e. God. The seriousness of the Covenant relationship can be understood when we look at the unfailing and ongoing relationship of God with human beings. Though we fail time and again to keep our promises of faithfulness and love towards God, yet God remains faithful and never gives up on us.

A Covenant signifies an eternal relationship. It cannot break with the storms and tempests of life. Rather it grows stronger and sweeter with each passing hurdles. When two people commit themselves to each other for a lifetime, it demands undivided devotion, unflinching love, and unwavering faithfulness towards each other. This is possible only with God as the strong Foundation. If He is the chief corner stone, friend, philosopher and guide of both the partners, there is 100% guaranty that any marriage, no matter how miserably mismatched according to the worldly standard will never hit the rocks but will always have a safe landing in spite of rough weather.

In the subsequent issues we will study more about ‘marriage in God’s plan’.
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Doctors’ Prescription

Food For Mind: Meditation

Everyone seeks peace, happiness, & harmony in life. From time to time we all experience irritation, anger, agitation, depression, low in energy levels, disappointments and sufferings. And one who suffers from all these, he would not keep these things only to him, but it reflects on others too. Each and everyone who comes in contact with him are in danger of becoming irritated & agitated.
Management of stressful situations, bad moments needs two approaches:
J A Positive attitude
J A calm, rested & relaxed mind
If a person adopts the above two, the same stressful situations would not appear as stressful because of this relaxed overview.

All of us are forced to go through some or the other distressed situations in day to day life, due to competitive life, increased standards & lack of moral values. Hence one needs to meditate & relax, to lead a happy & prosperous life.

Meditation was once associated only with saints & mystics, but now it is sweeping the globe. Never before have so many felt the need to search for a relaxed and composed state of mind within themselves. People everywhere are turning inwards to enhance their state of mind and to find greater degree of self-composure, harmony & happiness.

Various Schools practice meditation, in different ways. Most simpler, easiest, ways of meditation will be discussed in the subsequent issues of CANDLES.

Dr. K.N.Sukumar,
Nature Cure & Yoga Research Institute.

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Your Praying Friends

Are you depressed, sad, stressed out, feeling lonely, discouraged?

Do you have family problems?

Don't worry!

‘The Candles’ has taken a new step for you.

Just take time to write to us at ‘share_your_problems@hotmail.com’.

We are ready to LISTEN, to ENCOURAGE you and PRAY for you.

We have ‘Praying Friends’ who have eagerly waiting

for your requests to pray for you continuously.

You can also contact us through our postal address.

May God Bless you!

(Mrs. Asmita Patra, Manager for “Your Praying Friends”)
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Be A Counselor

Question of the last issue: "Anita cannot control her Anger. What do you suggest her to get rid of her anger?”

Best Entries are as follows:

1. Unjustified anger can bring about Anita’s downfall. Therefore she should make herself mentally strong to overcome this negative quality. According to me she should be patient and handle the situation calmly instead of being aggressive. She should be quiet and wait for the right time to speak.
ANNIE LAKRA, Kolkata

(We didn't receive any other entries)

Question for this issue: “Sony, has an addiction of food; what do you suggest her to get rid of her addiction?” Please send your entries within 50 words and within 20th November 2006.

'CANDLES' August & September 2006 Issue

Editorial

LOVE is...

Love has become cheap and cold these days. It is always misinterpreted as lust. But the Bible teaches us the real meaning of Love, which is far above than the love that world understands.

The Bible says - Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails;

There are three things that will endure—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.

Wow! What a description of the true & divine love. Brother & Sister! Lets practice the above-described LOVE in our daily lives.
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His Presence

I have a God, who is so great,
Who stays with me, close & near...

He keeps His arms around me,
And makes me feel safe & secure...

He always keeps His promises,
He shows His tender loving care...

He is my strong & mighty tower,
I don't have anything to fear...

He forgives all my sins,
He is my one & only cure...

His Presence makes me happy always
Coz...He stays with me, close & near.

(An emotional expression of
Mrs. Asmita Patra)

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A Cancer Called Ego
Dr. Anupam Dey

If you are a patient, then no doubt the word cancer would frighten you to the utmost limits, but few know that if you are a doctor the cancer word frightens you more. You would ask why..?...Well like living with it is bad, treating it is worse and nowhere does it frighten you more than in the Surgical Outpatient Department. The other day I was sitting in the Surgery OPD when a 20-year-old girl came with her mother for a routine checkup. All her reports were in order and just while leaving I casually asked her, “Is there any other problem that ails you?” Her mother hesitantly told me of a breast lump that has developed in her daughter's breast. I examined her right away and the investigations revealed that she had breast cancer and needed surgery immediately, otherwise the cancer would spread. She was in tears…. and I had no words to console her.

Cancer is a cellular phenomenon. If one looks at a cancerous cell through the eyes of 'seeing', what does one see? What causes a cell to become cancerous? Questions definitely arise. Healthy cells work in harmony. They have the innate knowledge of their purpose. Part of this intelligence is the knowing that they are part of a larger whole what we call body. A healthy cell works diligently to carry out its purpose for greater good of the body. A cancerous cell is one that has lost its purpose and has become a rogue cell that multiplies incessantly with no regard for the damage it's causing. One thus can say that the cancerous cell has succumbed to “ego”.

How does it then apply to us humans? …. Well, like the cell we too are a part of a body, and when we become egoistic, we become cancerous and lose our very purpose in life for which we got created. We move around like a rudderless ship, with no sense of direction and purpose. There are several examples in today's world where ego has led to one's fall and destruction.

George Bush, erstwhile President, of the United States of America, the most powerful country in the World, is perhaps one very relevant example. His ego led to the brutal killings of so many people in Iraq. It literally destroyed the country once known for its oil exports. Today the people there lie in despair.

Our very own Dada, Sourav Ganguly has to be the best example till date. In his prime he was one of the most prolific run scorers in One Day Cricket history and is India's most successful captain. What went wrong was that he had an ego that he couldn't control. An ego that ate him like cancer does. At a time when he should have relinquished his captaincy, his ego didn't let him to. Today he is heartbroken that in the past twelve months, he has played only two matches for India.

The question then arises is, what this “Ego” is? Well, a simple psychological definition of the ego is something like the "self-organizing principle," that all-important command center in the psyche that coordinates the different aspects of the self. When this ego is unmasked, seen directly for what it is, finally un obscured by the other expressions of the personality, one finds oneself literally face-to-face with a demona demon that thrives on power, domination, control and separation, that cares only about itself and is willing to destroy anything and everything that is good and true in order to survive intact and always in control. This demon lacks any capacity for empathy, compassion, generosity or love; delights in its perfect invulnerability; and, worst of all, will never ever acknowledge that which is sacred. Ego pushes you to the brink of defeat, letting you to be detached from that body called the body of God and that is the biggest problem. It happens with everyone and I have been a victim. It is important to understand that because the ego can usurp any calling of the human soul in order to remain in control even the longing for liberationist’s usually impossible to tell exactly who it is who is claiming they want to be free until that moment when their faith and love for truth alone are put to the test. It is only then that we can actually find out who we really are and what part of our self is pulling the strings of our own destiny. To walk the spiritual path in earnest is to find out what we're made of and how much we are truly willing to give up in order to come to the end of division within ourselves. The price for that kind of profound and deeply liberating simplicity is too high for most, because that price is ego death. What does that mean? That means endeavoring with all our being to purify ourselves from any and every attachment, gross and subtle, to the narcissistic ego, that demon of false individuality that masquerades as our own self and whose task is to keep us, at all costs, separate from our own heart. In cancer the treatment norms are simple. In cancer we try and remove the tumor surgically. In the cancer of the “Ego” we submit ourselves to the magnificent Creator…God Almighty who has the innate ability to perform a surgery and burn to the cancer in us. We just need to line up ourselves in his Surgical OPD, the rest He takes care.

“REMEMBER! EGO CAN DESTROY YOU”

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Our Family

ALTERNATIVES TO GOD'S PLAN?
Mr. Chiradeep Patra

Marriage relationship in today’s world has been changed. There are many different kinds of life styles that have come up against the traditional marriage relationship. People don't like the traditional adult relationship anymore but they have found out many alternatives to the traditional marriage. Let us go through these alternatives in details:

SINGLEHOOD: 'Single hood' is a term, which means an adult who is never legally married or divorced or widowed or the separated ones etc. who lives all alone on his/her own.

Causes of Single hood:
1. Free lifestyle and employment options. 2. The increased number of women in higher education. 3. A single can enjoy an active social and sexual life. 4. Not finding the right partner at the right age. 5. Mental deficiencies & physical disability.

Sometimes God allows single hood for a special and noble purpose that may be spiritual or social. But God never allows or approves single hood for other reasons, like free sex life etc.

Disadvantages:
a. Loneliness.
b. Un fulfillment of emotional and physical desires.
c. A woman can't have a child.
d. No emotional security.

COHABITATION: It has become quiet popular in the west especially among college students and young adults. When asked to check the most important reason why they choose to live with someone, the majority of cohabitants picked 'emotional attachment to each other' most frequently and variations sexual enjoyment.

How disgusting! God hates such relationships. It is fornication in God's sight and a sin.

Disadvantage:
a. Premature living and daring experience.
b. Lack of emotional involvement.
c. Social stigma.
d. Legal complications.

OPEN MARRIAGE: Open marriage is a life style, which emphasizes on personal privacy, autonomy and independence. In this kind of life style the spouses give each other full freedom to have extramarital relationship. They don't interfere or object to their sexual preferences etc. This relationship may vary from one-night stand to long-term involvements.

SWAPPING: In this category the spouses literally exchange their own partners with another couple. But both the couples engage in such extramarital affair at the same time and usually in the same place. These are all organized and preplanned occurrences. These couples meet each other through personal references, public or private swinging clubs, or through advertisement etc.

COMMUNES: It's a group of five or more adult individuals who are not related by blood or marriage, who have decided to live together, without any commitments. Even the children those who are interested to join these groups can join. There are different types of communes with respect to variables such as sexual and ethnic composition, size, ideology and geographic locations.

Though all these alternatives are prevalent in western countries but the present Indian scenario indicates that soon it will be a way of living for Indian too. But we need to know that God has never formed or approved any of these institutions. Man for his own lustful and selfish desire has designed this kind of arrangements and the end result of these kinds of institutions is mere destruction.

In the next issue we will see ‘How God has designed Marriage’ in His own way.
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Doctors’ Prescription

SPROUTS - The Miracle Food
Dr. P.Sameera

Sprouts are germinated seed of grains or legumes. In the process of sprouting they acquire the properties of preserving and growing a life. Hence have rejuvenating and health promoting qualities. They are believed as, miracle food, a prime source of nutrients having a high food potency.

In naturopathy, sprouts are treated as living food. Being alkaline in nature sprouts help in improving health, purifying the body and making it immune to disease. Hence naturopaths consider sprouts as medicine.

What can be sprouted? Grains like wheat, maize, Ragi, Bajra, and barley. Legues like Moong, moth, Bengal gram, Groundnut and peas. Seeds like Alfa Alfa, methi, Radish seeds, and carrot seeds, Dhaniya, pumpkin, muskmelon seeds and soyabean etc. can be sprouted.

How to Sprout? Grains, Legumes or seeds should be washed several times and soaked overnight with water. Wash them next morning and tie with a cotton cloth, kept in a suitable place, sprinkling water in between or can be left in a bowl with a lid. Once the sprouts appear it can be taken for use. Germination is quick in summer and late in winter.

Nutritional Benefits of sprouts -

1. In the process of sprouting, the vitamins, minerals and proteins increase substantially with decrease in Calories and carbohydrate content there is an amazing increase in nutrients in sprouted foods compared to their dried forms. For instance, proteins increase by 30% and carbohydrates and calories decrease by 9 and 15% respectively is because carbohydrate molecules break up, allows the absorption of atmospheric nitrogen and forms amino acids. These resultant proteins are high and easily digestible.
2. Sodium content increases by 690% and aids not only digestion but also elimination of carbon dioxide from the gastrointestinal tract.
3. There is an infinite increase in vit-c, which helps to build our immunity and delays aging.
4. There is also 515% of increase in vit-B2, 285%vit-A, 256% of B3, 208% of vit-B1, 56% of phosphorus, 40% of Iron, 80% of Potassium, and 34% of Calcium etc.

The only disadvantage of sprouts is gas formation, but for maintenance of health, some amount of gas production is necessary. Hence sprouts should be taken in a limited quantity. Sprouts can be taken preferably in the breakfast. But can also be taken for lunch. Sprouts can be steamed and taken. But other forms of cooking are not advisable as it reduces nutrition.
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Be A Counselor

We face problems everyday in our families or at our work places. Some of us are more equipped with some spiritual and psychological virtues, through which we tackle all these problems everyday in a right manner. Don't you think that we should share those virtues with each others to help each others in our lives? Aiming at this objective we are introducing another new column named, as “Be a Counselor”. In this column we will give a question / problem, and you have to give answers / solutions in not more than 50 words (entries more than 50 words will be rejected). We will publish three best entries in the subsequent issue of CANDLES.

Question for this issue: “Anita cannot control her Anger. What do you suggest her to get rid of her anger?” Please send your entries before 25th September 2006. No time limits for the blog readers and Internet users.

'CANDLES' June & July 2006 Issue

Guest Editorial

THE 'A' FACTOR

Dr. Anupam Dey

I have gained a lot from reading and from my interaction with bright young doctors who have achieved great success in life. My fascination for these success ridden people has revolved around how they have achieved it .You see I was in search of a formula for success and my interaction with these top knotch doctors revealed one thing - Attitude. Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, its not 'A' for Apple but ‘A’ for Attitude that led them to success.

The World around us is replete with examples of people who have made it big in life due to their attitude.

Abraham Lincoln was the 16th President of the United States of America. In spite of a poor background with several adversities he became great, because his attitude was always right, rich and genuine. He did the unthinkable by abolishing slavery that, 15 Presidents before him couldn't think of.

Henry Ford, the founder of the Ford Motor Company that till today rolls out beautiful cars like the Ford Ikon, had loads of attitude to take him to the top of the automobile industry. Ford's first automobile company went bankrupt; his second company failed too - but he didn't give up. The third Automobile Company was a global success.

Sachin Tendulkar is the biggest and most relevant example of attitude-laden success. While every cricketer dreams of being the best in his time, this boy dreamt a little more - of being the best there ever was, even as a little boy, playing in the park. He was introspective, quite critical of every shot he played and every century he scored. At 16 he debuted for India and is today the only batsman ever to be compared with the great Sir Donald Bradman universally.

Looking at these examples closely you will come to realize that each of them had an attitude laden with - positive thinking, learning from mistakes, persistence in the face of adversity and the ability to keep revising and refreshing their goals.

In today's world, there are many with good personality but with negative attitude. Even you and me go through such phases in our lives. As a student of medicine, I have gone through phases where I have lacked the attitude punch and believe me these phases have been quite nightmarish because though I've had the skills and the knowledge, without attitude somehow the success urge hasn't been enough. It's likewise on the spirituality front too. You suddenly lose the power to grow spiritually and reach to the level of resigning yourself to depression and sin.

The good news is that all is not lost. Attitude can be regained back. You just have to log in to the website called God, sign in as a member if you haven't yet and then download it for free, so that whenever in future to go out into the big bad world, the attitude factor stays with you like an Anti virus.
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Breaking Bad News

Dr. Smruti Ranjan Panda

[Neil, a 10 yr old boy had met with an accident while returning home after school. When he was brought to our Hospital, he was suffering from multiple fractures including his skull bone (Head). He was rushed to the operation theater and was operated upon. Part of his brain was already damaged and he was fighting for his life on artificial machinery supports. He had been deteriorating over the last 24 hrs. His chances of survival were slim.]

As I was walking down the Intensive Care Unit, I was greeted by a young lady in her early '30s, who introduced herself as Neil's mother. “Doctor, Neil is my only child…he is obedient though some times naughty…he topped his class last year…he loves to sing and is the youngest member of the church choir…he loves to eat chocolates…but…how is he now?”

I felt a choke down my throat. It was as if my brain had shut down for a few seconds. This was one of the few times in my life, where I had fallen short of words… a long intriguing silence.

How many times have you come across situations in which you had to be the first person to break the bad news to other? Below here are a few points to keep in mind while breaking bad news.

1. PRAY! First look at God for the guidance and then try to use your brains.
2. Break bad news to the male gender (preferably); women are more emotional.
3. In case of more than one bad news, try to analyse the situation and then start slowly.
4. Always break the worst news last.
5. Be with the person after you break the bad news (Accompany him / her).
6. Touch therapy does help.

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5'Ss to Develop your PR

Mrs. Asmita Patra

Whoever has a Personal Relationship (PR) with God, somebody who knows & understands God's heart and seeks His face for everything and in every situation can have a life of abundance. Whether the person is alone or in the midst of a crowd, his face sparkles with overflowing joy. He doesn't have to declare that 'I am a child of God.' His sparkling face makes this fact clear to everybody.

Guilty consciousness for anything hinders us to have a good relationship with God, with others and even with our own self. Neither we can have a life of Joy nor can we grow spiritually if we have a guilt conscience. We need to have a clear conscience to be at peace with God, with others as well as with our own self. A Personal Relationship with God gives us the sense of good and bad, so that we could have a life without blemish and also without guilt conscience. We can lead a joyous life, which the world cannot give.

There are few people in the Bible like Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Joseph, and Paul etc., who had walked in peace with God and with others in their whole lifetime. They had never spent any moment of their lives in guilt consciousness, because all of them had a wonderful personal relationship with the God Almighty.

How is your relationship with God today? Do you have any relationship with God? If the answer is NO, then I want to disclose 5 Ss (Secrets) for developing a good relationship with God in our daily lives, which are as under:

1. Spending quality time with Him in Prayer.
2. Studying His word to know Him better.
3. Shedding all your tears only before Him.
4. Saving the first Place for Him in your life.
5. Sharing your Joy with others to magnify Him.

Dear friends! He is eagerly waiting for us to take the first step. Let's build up a fresh relationship with God and be joyous & in peace with the Almighty, with others and with our own self.
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Are You Stressed Out?

Mr. Chiradeep Patra

STRESS is very common in our daily lives. There is not a single person who is stress free. Everybody is under the bondage of stress in this modern world. We need to know, what is the definition and meaning of this word 'Stress'? Stress is “Any life changes and events that put forth pressures on the individual's coping abilities”.

Mild stress is always good for the people in this competitive world. It motivates to face the challenge. But when stress becomes chronic it affects adversely both on our mental as well as physical being. And we become diseased with 'Psycho-Physiological Diseases' that means the afflicted individual due to emotional psychological stress as the cause brings the physical symptoms upon himself.

The emotional factor cause bodily changes of maladaptive nature as well as to sustain them. The physiological disorder therefore is a real disease and not imaginary one.

Psycho Physiologic Diseases or problems due to STRESS:

1. Skin Problems: Eczema, Pimples, and Mouth Ulcer.
2. Problems of Muscles & Bones: Backaches, Muscles Cramp, Tension Headache and some Arthritis.
3. Respiratory Problems: Asthma and Bronchitis.
4. Cardiac Problems: Hypertension, Heart Attacks,
5. Genital & Urinary Problems: Problems in Menstruation and Urination.
6. Endocrine Problems: Thyroid Problems and Obesity
7. Stomach & Intestinal Problems: Peptic Ulcer, Duodenal Ulcer & Gastric problems.
8. Problems of other types: Disturbances in the nervous system for emotional factors.
9. Psychiatric Problems: Depression, Mania, Hysteria, Suicidal tendencies.

The above description makes it very essential for us to overcome stress as soon as possible. Under there are few stress relievers mentioned for your help:

Physiological Stress Relievers:-
1. Giving up smoking & alcohol intake
2. Getting Regular Exercise
3. Relaxing & having fun is necessary
4. Reducing anger, anxiety & depression
5. Managing your time tactfully & Learning Prioritizing
6. Changing your environment & Distraction from the problem
7. Refocusing attention & Reinforce positive self-statements
8. Focusing on your Good qualities & accomplishments
9. Recognizing & accepting your limits
10. Having a Balanced Diet
11. Share your problems with your closest friend or person
12. Doctors' advice should be taken when it’s serious

Spiritual Stress Relievers:-
1. Just break down & PRAY to God (Phil. 4:6-7)
2. CAST all your BURDEN on God (1 Pet. 5:6-7)
3. TRUST in God & do Good (Ps. 37: 3)
4. DELIGHT yourself in the Lord (Ps. 37: 4)
5. COMMIT your WAY to the Lord ((Ps. 37: 5)
6. WAITING PATIENTLY for God to answer (Ps. 37: 7)
7. Be at PEACE with everybody (which reduces friction & Stress) (Prov. 14:30)
8. Be CHEERFUL every time (Prov. 17:22)
9. Learn to FORGIVE (Eph. 4:31-32)

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Doctors’ Prescription

Walk Your way to health

Dr. P.Sameera

Oxygen is the most essential component of life than food and water. Food and water can be stored by the human body, but not oxygen, as it is used up soon after breathed in. We do have reserve capacity in our lungs, but hardly about 60 seconds. Aerobic exercise strengthens the body's respiratory system, by enhancing the intake, utilization, distribution and reserves of oxygen. Aerobic means, exercise that enhances the body's ability to oxygenate. And walking is the most simple and important of all other aerobic form of exercise. Walking is the easiest, most convenient and inexpensive form of exercise.

The benefits of walking are as under:

1. It's suitable for all ages, old and young and both the sexes.
2. It gives the similar benefit as swimming, rowing or dance aerobic but without the burnout.
3. Walking improves muscle tone, especially of the legs, hips, shoulders, arms, abdomen and back.
4. In addition, it makes one slim, speeds up the body metabolism and burns calories.
5. Walking relieves anxiety, depression and stress.
6. It helps in weight loss and obesity reduction.
7. It is truly a cardio beneficial activity. By utilizing body fat, walking reduces the body's LDL (Low Density Lipoprotein or Bad cholesterol). And increases the HDL (High Density lipoprotein or Good cholesterol). In turn HDL protects heart from LDL Which causes the artery blockage.
8. Walking helps strengthen the heart and artery muscles. Improves circulation and increases oxygenation. Hence reduces High blood pressure.
9. It increases the body's glucose utilization and helps in diabetic mellitus or High blood sugar.
10. Walking prevents arthritis, spondylosis and Back pain.
11. It strengthens bones and prevents osteoporosis.
12. Headaches, depression and fatigue (premenstrual syndrome) are banished due to endorphin effect of walking.
13. Walking in pregnancy readies the body for delivery by strengthening the abdomen, back, pelvic area, legs, heart and lungs.
14. Walking is not only physical but also mental. It enervates and revitalizes the mind, while sedentary life fatigues the thinking mind.
15. Over all, Walking benefits your body, mind and soul.

NOW, GO. TAKE A WALK. AND DISCOVER THE JOYS OF GOOD HEALTH